If you’ve been feeling you are not ready or been waiting for a sign to finally go for it—consider this episode your neon flashing billboard. 

Things talked about:

• What is the confidence gap
• Self reminders when feeling not ready
• Three power moves you can implement

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Hey there friends of LL, and welcome back to The Lucy Liu Show. I’m LL, your host and confidence coach, here to help you cultivate unshakable self-belief and make bold moves.

Today, we’re tackling a topic that holds so many women back:

The Confidence Gap—the disconnect between how ready you actually are and how ready you feel you are. 

Whether you’re considering launching a new business, applying for a promotion, or starting a podcast, whatever it is that you want, I want you to know this: you’re more ready than you think.

By the end of this episode, you’ll walk away with a fresh perspective on your readiness, real data that proves you’re already equipped, and actionable tips to close the confidence gap once and for all.

So let’s dive in!

You know that moment when you read a job description and you think, “I only meet 70% of the qualifications—I’m not ready”? Well, studies show that men will apply for jobs if they meet just 60% of the requirements, while most women feel they need to meet 100% before they even consider applying.

That, my friend, is the confidence gap in action.

But here’s the thing:
✅ Your qualifications, skills, and experience are real.
✅ Your self-doubt? That’s a story.
And it’s time to stop letting fiction dictate your future.

The confidence gap shows up beyond job applications, too.

• You might be waiting until you feel “expert enough” before pitching your ideas or creating content.

• You might hesitate to raise your rates or ask for what you’re worth or ask for a promotion because you feel you need just one more certification or accomplishment.

• You might be holding back from sharing your story or message until you feel fully polished.

But here’s the truth: Your competence isn’t the issue—your perception of it is.

Let me hit you with some tough love: You’re never going to feel 100% ready. And that’s okay. Because readiness isn’t a feeling—readiness is a decision.

Think about it:

• You didn’t feel fully ready the first time you drove a car, but you just got in the car and did it anyway.

• You didn’t feel totally prepared the first time you led a meeting, but you showed up and figured it out.

• You weren’t sure you were ready for some of the boldest moves you’ve made—but looking back, you were more capable than you gave yourself credit for.
• In hindsight, when people say Lucy you made some bold moves! I’m like what? I didn’t even think they were bold moves at the time, I just did it.

Your brain is wired for safety. It wants to protect you from risk, protect you from rejection, and protect you from discomfort. 

But growth? Growth lives in the discomfort zone and the feeling after growth is amazing!

Here’s what I want you to remember:

1. You’ve already proven yourself. Think of three times you did something before you felt fully ready. You didn’t just survive—you crushed it.

2. Perfection is not the prerequisite. No one expects you to be flawless. They expect you to be real. Start messy and let mastery follow. Everytime I make a grammar mistake or I start thinking “oh I should have said that instead” that’s exactly when I immediately shift my mindset and say I sure hope that mistake inspires someone out there to go for it.

3. You can not learn confidence from the sidelines. You build it by stepping into the arena. Action first, confidence second.

So, how do you close the confidence gap once and for all? Here are three power moves you can implement today:

 1. Embrace the “Good Enough” Rule:
Instead of aiming for perfect, aim for good enough to start. Research shows that people who take action before they feel fully ready build confidence faster.
 Ask yourself: “What if I’m already ready? What if I just go for it and figure it out along the way?”

 2. Borrow Belief:
If you struggle to see how capable you are, borrow the belief from people who already do. Whether it’s a friend, coach, or mentor—listen when they tell you, “You’ve got this.” Let their belief carry you until yours catches up. I always say this to my clients: “I believe you more than you believe it yourself!” It’s true, my belief for you to success is much more unwavering and that’s why I am confident to coach you.

 3. Do It Scared:
The fear won’t disappear before you take action—it disappears because you take action. Make the bold move despite the self-doubt. You’ll realize you were far more ready than you gave yourself credit for.

 Alright ,my friend, I hope you’re walking away with one powerful realization: You are more ready than you think. 

While I love courses to learn and grow myself. You actually don’t need more courses, more certifications, or years of experience. 

You need more action.

If this episode resonated with you, do me a favor: share it with one woman in your life who needs this reminder today. And if you haven’t already, hit subscribe so you never miss an episode that boosts your confidence and fuels your bold moves.

Until next week —keep showing up, even if you’re scared. You’ve got this. 

 P.S. If you’re ready to build unshakable confidence, grab the first 10 chapters of my book, Confident and epic, for free. 

This episode is for you if you are an ambitious entrepreneurial woman wanting to turn your BIG thinking into EXTRAORDINARY results, make sure you stay until the end so we can help you open some doors and explore what’s possible out there for you.

Guest Andrea Liebross is a Business Growth Coach & Life Integration Strategist | Keynote Speaker | Best-Selling Author of the book “She Thinks Big” | Host of the “She Thinks Big” Podcast

Things we talked about: 

• What “Thinking Big” mean?
• Why people think smaller than what’s capable?
• How to expand your vision to thinking big?
• Steps to take to thinking bigger?
• and so much more

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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Hello, hello, beautiful souls. This episode is for you if you are an ambitious entrepreneurial woman wanting to turn your big thinking into extraordinary results. Make sure you stay until the end because we are going to help you open some doors and explore what’s possible out there for you.

For this special reason, I have my guest today, Andrea Libros. She is a business growth coach, life integration strategist, keynote speaker, bestselling author of the book, She Thinks Big, and host of the She Thinks Big podcast. Welcome to the show, Andrea.

Thanks for having me, Lucy. I’m happy to be here. So excited to have you.

I love your brand, She Thinks Big. You’re all about thinking big. So let’s start there.

What does thinking big actually mean to you?

Oh, it can mean so many things, but let’s just go with this particular meaning that I kind of really help my clients with. I really think that big thinking is the thinking that comes from future you, okay? So we have our past you, we’ve got the present you, but then there’s future you.

And future you is you a year from now, three years from now, five years from now, 10 years from now, who has created the life or the business is in a place where they’re loving it. I always say she’s smiling. Future you is smiling and she’s showing up for herself and for others in a way that feels powerful, that feels good, that feels kind of velvety, I like to say.

So if you go talk to that future you and you ask her, what does she think you should be doing today or how you should be showing up today? That’s the origin of big thinking, right? So you can’t, big thinking is hard to come from, to be born out of your day to day.

It’s also hard sometimes to think about what you really want for in the future. But if you can access and kind of become friends, I call it meet your future you, then that’s where the big thinking comes from.

I love that answer. I’m smiling right now. I’m loving my life.

Good, say that again.Look at that. 

I love my life. Life is good, right?

Yes, yes.

So it’s powerful stuff. And this morning I was working with someone and she’s starting to put this down on paper. She’s like, I can’t believe I’m actually writing this down.

I can’t believe I’m verbalizing this bigger thinking. And then sometimes I’ll say to someone, you need to listen back to this recording because your whole tone, your whole demeanor, your whole, all your facial expressions just changed when you started to think bigger.

Was there a moment in your life when you realized you were thinking too small?

Yes, there, yes. There has been many moments. And I think this is also something too that we can kind of ebb and flow and go in and out of just on a daily basis in a sense.

I think the biggest, my biggest aha moment was about, and that’s been about eight years ago where I was working in a corporate role and I was doing recruiting and hiring and training for a company that was predominantly female-based actually. And what I was doing was recruiting women to start their own branch of the business or kind of like their own franchise, even though technically, legally, it wasn’t franchises. They were franchises in a way.

And I was helping them get their business off the ground and what they would call training them, which I really realized in the end was coaching them. And the joke became if I had one more great idea that I shared with the leadership, corporate leadership team that didn’t come into play or wasn’t acted upon in what maybe we would call a timely manner, but then eventually two or three years later, they did put it into action. That just needed to happen one more time and then I was out, quit.

So that happened. I realized why I had so much, I would say kind of anger and disappointment and frustration in that period of my life is that I was being kept in this very small thinking container and I wasn’t allowed really or welcomed. It wasn’t, this bigger thinking wasn’t welcomed.

So that me leaving and me just walking away, that was when I said I’ve had enough of the small thinking and I needed to think bigger. And I see that happen over and over again to women. You know, we stay in situations or because we think it can’t be better somewhere else or we stay in a mode of thinking because it feels safe.

And what I love helping women do is to get out of that cycle and to really dream. And dreams to me, I don’t know if you ever heard the expression pipe dream, like that’s a pipe dream. Well, the origin of that pipe dream is when, I don’t know, way back in the day, there were of course probably some guys sitting around smoking opium out of pipes and things felt kind of euphoric.

And dreams should feel euphoric. They should feel joyful. And big thinking doesn’t have to be dreamy but there is a component of it that is there.

And then we need goals to actually make it happen and we could have a whole other podcast episode on that. But when I wasn’t allowed to really dream, that’s when I was done with that situation. So yeah.

Love it. Why do you believe most people settle for less than what they’re actually capable of?

I think it really comes down to the motivational triad inside our brains that we wanna be safe, we want things to be easy, we want things to be efficient, we want them to be pleasurable and staying in the known, even if it is not ideal, is safer or is easier than the unknown or things that are uncertain. So I say, in order to be a big thinker, there’s five tenets of big thinking and I use the word trust as an acronym. And the U in trust stands for embracing the unknown or uncertainty.

And that is really why we can stay thinking small and what needs to happen in order to think bigger. You’ve got to get, you don’t have to love it, but you have to realize that part of this is part of the reality of all of this is that you’re not gonna know or things are unknown. So I see a lot in my world when I’m working on a consult call, for example, and I’ve talked to whoever this is on the other line and do you think I can help you?

Yes. We’ve kind of mutually agreed on that. And at the end of the call, they say, you know what, here’s what’s gonna happen.

I’m gonna think about this and I’m gonna get back to you. And I’m all about thinking clearly, and that is totally fine if you would like to think about it, get back to me. I get it, I get it, I do that too.

But I ask for permission to put my coach hat on and I say, can I just, can I put my coach hat on for one minute? And they always say, sure. And I say, what exactly are you thinking about?

Like, what are you trying to like determine or what’s going on? No one really has a great answer to that. There’s no like, this is exactly what I’m thinking about kind of answer.

Sometimes they bring up money or talking to their spouse or they’re not someone that makes rash decisions. That’s just not how they do things. And really what’s going on there though, is that their brain is kind of searching for evidence to make this feel better, to get them out of this place where there’s some uncertainty and into certainty to be sure that whatever they’re gonna do next or if they start to work with me, for example, like that’s gonna be exactly what they need.

It’s gonna be perfect. There’s nothing in the mental Rolodex that’s gonna give them that evidence that they’re looking for. So that’s where another example of, if you’re someone that says, I’m gonna think about it and then you kind of stay in this sort of, I call it you’re interested but not committed zone, you’ve gotta get comfy with the unknown.

I love the word uncertainty. I actually did a whole podcast episode prior in life, uncertainty is actually the only true certainty we have. It is, it is.

So it totally changed my life after I started embracing and loving uncertainty because we see it as a fear. We see it as something blocking us. That’s a different life you’re living rather than you see excitement.

You see what’s possible for you out there after the uncertainty, right?

Because that’s the whole fun of it. 

And I always say you’re giving equal air time to the amazing pieces of the puzzle that could happen or the greatness that’s ahead of you. We don’t give it equal air time.

Our brain wants to go to the things that won’t work, possibly won’t work or the things that you’ll fail or it will feel yucky. We don’t give equal air time to the other side of the coin. And I also, I listened to a podcast of yours recently about everything is temporary.

Yeah, everything like, we don’t know what’s gonna happen this afternoon. I mean, we don’t, right? We don’t know.

So even though you may have your whole day planned out, you really don’t know exactly how it’s all gonna shake out. So we do have evidence though that you can get through uncertainty. So that’s the good news.

Like the good news is that you do know how to do unknown and uncertainty and recognizing that should give you that power to move forward.

I love that. So uncertainty is a big mindset block. I’ve seen enough of, I’m not ready enough.

I don’t have enough of blank, fill in the blank, right? Or when this happens, then it’ll be the perfect time. Yes, yes.

We’ve all been there. We’re human, it’s normal. What are some other common mindset blocks or limiting beliefs you see from keeping people from thinking big?

I think one of the, kind of ties to this, but one of the things that keeps us from thinking big is this whole notion that it should feel great. So I think all of us, again, that’s part of the motivational triad. You want things to feel good, but big thinkers know that there really isn’t a problem.

The only real problem is that you don’t want to experience this negative feeling. So thinking that it’s gonna feel good is another thing that gets in your way of thinking big. So if you can just understand that the R in trust, which is, these are the five things that all big thinkers do.

The R in trust, I say stands for a real problem. And the real problem isn’t really a problem. That’s kind of like the good news.

It’s the problem is that you just don’t want to experience that uncertainty. So this morning I was talking to a woman who she owns two big hair salons outside of Boston. And she wants to open a third and fourth location.

And she knows that in order to do that, she has to kind of grow some new leaders within her team. And she said to me, this just doesn’t, do you think I can do this? I’m so like, I’m so, I’m all in.

And then I have these little moments of doubt. And I said, yeah, and how does that doubt feel? She’s like, it doesn’t feel good at all.

I said, okay, so that’s really the only problem. You just have to know that you’re gonna have moments of doubt. Like you’re human and those are just feelings.

And they’re probably not gonna like go away a hundred percent but we have to learn how to do doubt. We have to learn how to do, like we need to learn how to do the uncertainty piece of the puzzle. And when we kind of phrased it, like framed it like that, she was like, oh, I can do that.

You know, I’ve done a lot of harder things in my life. So big thinkers need to know the real problem is really just a negative feeling. And they also need to embrace that uncertainty.

Okay, so how else do you help someone expand their vision when it comes to these naturally feeling fear, doubt, right? It doesn’t feel real. Nope, nope.

Cause it’s out there, right? Yeah, in this lifetime. Yes.

Like before I started this podcast, I didn’t even listen to podcasts. I didn’t even know about podcasts. Yeah.

But once it’s in your life, it’s so real. It is. I love podcasting, I love podcasters and I love bringing value to anyone that comes my way.

But in the beginning, of course, it’s not that easy, right?

It’s not that easy. And I think that one of the reasons it’s not easy is because we get stuck in what I call passive action. Okay, so like you were like, all right, maybe I should do a podcast.

Maybe I should do a podcast. And I’m gonna guess, even if you hadn’t listened to any podcasts, you probably were like, I’m gonna listen to a couple. I’m gonna do some Googling.

I’m gonna ask some people, right? And then I’m just gonna dive in. So what happened there is you shifted from the place of just taking, of being in passive action into massive action.

And that’s a hard transition because we’re really good at passive action. Passive action is like, you feel like you’re doing things, you’re doing all the things, but you don’t have any traction. So you are listening to a podcast.

Now clearly you and I think podcasts are great. So I’m all about listening to podcasts, but are you doing anything with the information that you’re consuming? Are you just being a consumer or are you taking massive action?

Reading book, passive action. Even asking 50 million people that you know, passive action. Googling, chat GPT, all that passive action.

So you’re doing things, but it’s not the massive action. I even see this when people start businesses. So they start a business and they say to me, I need a website.

Like I need the website to make me feel legit. And until I have that website up, I mean, I’m not gonna go after any business, right? So like the website building in and of itself in a sense is passive action because it’s like serving as a roadblock or a bottleneck for them doing the harder thing, which is marketing, right?

Or selling themselves or making an offer to help someone. So I think another piece of the puzzle is helping people move from this passive action into massive action. And that last T in trust, I say, stands for take massive action.

I cannot agree with you anymore. I’ve seen the same. And what I just tell my clients to do is just to go pay up for your LLC now to get that website.

And now it’s because you’re thinking you need that, which like you said, you don’t, but just do it anyway. So now you already have what you think you need. Then you go do take action towards the next step, right?

And for me, in our podcasting example, for me, I was just, I set a deadline to launch a podcast in 45 days. So that gives you, working backwards, that gives you momentum to actually do the real work. After you take passive action, the planning, the business plan, then you actually take action, the real action.

And you also just shift your mindset there with like, I can get this thing launched in 45 days, right? Because you could have easily have just said, oh, I can’t, it’s gonna take me four months, five months, right? So you have to kind of also play with all of the possibilities.

And I call those thought options. That’s another piece of the puzzle. And I think finding all the thought options on your own sometimes is really hard because you’re sort of stuck in your own, I say you’re stuck in your own peanut butter jar and you can’t read the label.

So you gotta have some label readers out there helping you see what’s possible.

Exactly, I love that, I love that. So we are all about thinking big and taking action, of course. So to actually implement something you’ve been thinking about, if a listener has something on the back burner, what is the first step you recommend them to take?

The first step is to secure support.

That is your very first step. You cannot go it alone. You can go it alone, but I’m gonna say that it’s gonna be painful and it’s probably going to take you a lot longer and you’re gonna be searching, searching, searching through your brain to try to find answers which aren’t gonna be readily available.

So I don’t know any big thinkers out there and we could be very stereotypical and talk about big thinkers like societal big thinkers or think about characters in movies, right? There’s always a wingman, right? So anyone who is thinking big has support.

And the other piece of this is your family, okay? So your family, yes, they could be, because I may say, who’s supporting you in this? Oh, my spouse, oh, my sister, oh, my mom or whatever.

They’re such great cheerleaders. So you totally need cheerleaders, but your family’s job is to really love you. Like that’s their job.

So let them do their job. And then you seek the support you need to do whatever you are setting out to do. If it’s losing weight, like you need to find outside support to help you reach that goal.

If it’s starting a business, you need to find outside support to help you reach that goal. If it’s learning how to play piano, you could watch a hundred YouTube videos or you could hire a piano teacher and you’d probably be way better off, right? So securing support is really important.

And it’s, your brain wants to say, oh, you should be able to figure this out on your own. But should you? Like, who says that?

That’s not necessarily a truth. So I say secure support.

I love that. I always say this. Yes, our family loves us.

Yes, your friends are amazing, but they might not have the same goals as you. Right, right. And they might not wanna be willing to tell you like the hard things.

Mm, exactly. I always say to my clients, you’re not gonna like this. I’m not here to make you like me because you don’t have to love me.

No, exactly.

But I’m still gonna say it and give it to you straight. Yes, a hundred percent, a hundred percent. So I think that securing support is like the ultimate key to all of this.

Okay, so I’m all about confidence because we need confidence in order to do things that we truly wanna dream about. What role do you think confidence play in thinking big?

Yep, here’s how I define confidence. I mean, we could define it like a thousand different ways, right? But one of the definitions that I like to use is that confidence is really your willingness to feel all the feelings.

So just in the last few minutes, we’ve talked about the feeling scared, feeling unsure of yourself, feeling like you don’t know what the next best step is, right? So feeling doubt. So you’ve gotta be willing.

If you’re willing to feel all those feelings, then that is confidence. You know, if you think about very stereotypical, like you’re gonna get on a stage and you’re gonna be scared once you look at the audience, but if you can be, if you’re okay with feeling a little unsure of yourself and a little scared when you get out there, then you’re gonna go out. So confidence is not something that you can buy off a shelf.

I don’t think confidence is something you’re born with. I think confidence is just you. It’s not even like experience in a sense.

It’s just the willingness to feel the whole array of feelings. And the good news is we all can do that, like as humans.

Totally, the willingness to embrace uncertainty. Yeah. The willingness to experience this journey, even if you know you might fail, because that’s the fun of it, right?

Yeah, yeah. And I think that would lead to what I really wanna discuss is the time is now, because people are like, this is uncertain time. Recession’s coming.

I think it’s especially important now for people to think big, because this is your opportunity, because when other people might be shrinking, the world needs you to show up even more. This is the time. It’s not the time to play it safe.

It’s not time to wait until the recession really comes or goes. It’s actually more important now. What do you think about that?

I always say the time to do something is right now. There’s no better time. And that, again, I think is just our brains trying to think that there is going to be some ideal time.

And this client this morning who owns the salons, so she just turned 40, she said, oh my gosh, I can’t believe, like I should have been doing this way earlier. I should have been doing this 10 years ago. And I said to her, so this is interesting.

So she’s saying I should have done it 10 years ago. She’s not saying I should do it 10 years from now. So this is kind of like a little play on the same topic, but just slightly different.

I said, okay, but why is right now, why is age 40 the perfect time for you to do this? And she came up with a million reasons, right? And I said, all right, so let’s go back.

Let’s make an argument for 30, age 30 was the perfect reason, time to do it. And we could come up with a million reasons. And then I did say, okay, let’s go and say 50 is the perfect, you need to wait.

50 is gonna be a better time. Could we come up with reasons? Oh yeah, we could come up with reasons.

So, but no set of reasons was better than the other when we looked at them all on the table. So she’s going for it right now. Yes, I love that.

Okay, so if the listener feels inspired from our conversation today, what is one last message you want them to take away?

I want them to realize that, I mean, it sounds super cliche, but anything really is possible. Anything is possible. It’s a matter of how much you are willing to expand your thinking, like push yourself beyond.

I say something I say, everything you always wanted is on the other side of uncomfortable. So if you’re willing to expand and almost like, I picture sometimes a balloon like blowing up with air. If you’re willing to put more air in there and stretch, then let’s do it.

Like, let’s go, I’m in. So it comes down to decision. It’s a decision, it’s so true.

It’s really all of life is just a series of decisions. You’ve already made so many decisions today, no matter what time it is at your house. It’s just a series of decisions.

Yes, so we don’t want you to just get inspired and feel inspired from listening to us. We want you to implement your great idea and think big and really to go for it. And we’re rooting for you.

Awesome, well, thank you for sharing your wisdom with us, Andrea. What is a favorite quote that you resort to when you need that extra push?

So since I’m in this entrepreneurial world, one of my favorite quotes is, being an entrepreneur is really a journey in personal development, disguised as an entrepreneurial adventure. So it’s supposed to be all adventurous and fun, but really what it is, it is fun and it is an adventure, but it’s really, you can only grow your business as much as you grow yourself. So being a business owner is really an exercise in you becoming a different version of yourself.

And I love that quote. I think it’s a great one to fall back on.

I love it, love it. This reminds me of another guest quote, which said that you transform the business of your life. That’s when you transform the life of your business.

Yeah, that’s perfect, love it, love it.

 So Andrea’s links will be linked in the show notes. Thank you again for being with us and all the blessings to everyone listening.

If you’ve hesitated to promote yourself and want to learn more self promotion skills, this episode is for you to get better at self promotion.

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Today, we’re tackling a topic that so many smart, talented, and successful women still struggle with: self-promotion.

You’ve built an impressive career, achieved incredible milestones, and yet, when it comes time to talk about your wins—whether it’s in a meeting, on LinkedIn, or even just in a casual conversation—you hesitate.

You’re not alone. In fact, this is one of the most common struggles I see in the women I coach. So, why is it still so hard for us to own our accomplishments with confidence?
Let’s dive in.

First, let me say this: if you struggle with self-promotion, it’s not because you’re not capable—it’s because you’ve been conditioned to self promote.

Think about it:

• Girls are often praised for being “polite” , “modest,” , “quiet” and “humble” while boys are encouraged to “be bold” “to step up” and to“go for it.”

• As we grow, we internalize these messages. So, while confidence in action comes naturally—leading projects, solving problems—confidence in visibility still feels foreign to many of you.

And then, there’s the fear of being judged.

Smart, successful women worry that promoting themselves too much will come across as:

• Arrogant

• Attention-seeking

• Or worse, inauthentic

But here’s the kicker:

Staying quiet doesn’t serve anyone—not you, not your business, not your followers and not the people you could be helping with your expertise.

Now, you might be thinking:
“Do I really need to talk about myself more? Won’t my work speak for itself?”

And I get it.
You want your results to do the talking.
But here’s the truth:
Results only speak if people know they exist.

You could be the best-kept secret in your industry—and that’s not a badge of honor. It’s a missed opportunity.

• When you shrink yourself, you limit your reach.

• When you downplay your wins, you make it harder for others to see your value.

• When you hesitate to share your story, you rob the world of the impact you’re meant to have.

And let’s talk dollars and cents for a second:
Research shows that women are less likely to negotiate for raises or promotions—and that directly affects their earning potential.

 So, how do we move past this?

 How do you promote yourself with confidence and authenticity?

Here are three simple but powerful strategies:

1. Reframe Self-Promotion as Service.
   When you share your wins, you’re not bragging—you’re serving.
   Think about the woman who needs to hear your story—the one who’s feeling stuck, wondering if she can make it.
   By promoting yourself, you give her proof that she can too.  Try this:

Next time you post about a recent win, instead of just stating the achievement, add a takeaway or a tip. 

For example:
Instead of: “Just landed my biggest client yet!”
Say: “Just landed my biggest client yet—by finally implementing this one simple strategy: asking for the sale directly. If you’ve been holding back, here’s your sign to go for it.”

Now, you’re promoting yourself and providing value.

2.  Practice Small, Consistent Visibility.
You don’t have to make grand gestures of self-promotion.
Instead, focus on small, consistent actions:

• Share a win in a team meeting.

• Post a quick reflection on LinkedIn.

• Speak up about your contributions during project updates.

Try this:
This week, challenge yourself to share one win—no matter how small.
It could be as simple as:
“I’m proud of the way I handled a tough conversation today.”

“I’m proud to have gained one follower on Instagram or 1 new subscriber on Youtube.
Visibility is a muscle—you have to exercise it regularly.

3.  Adopt a “Brag Buddy.”
You don’t have to do this alone.
Find a friend, colleague, or coach who will hold you accountable for sharing your wins.

• Text each other your wins
• Practice introducing yourselves with confidence.
• Cheer each other on.

If you feel you can use a little more help with self promotion, simply reach out to me and message me the words IamRemarkable, each month I hold a pitch free workshop to help you practice your self promotion skills. So message me your interest and I’ll let you in on my next workshop.
Try this:
Reach out to one person this week and say:
 “Hey, let’s be brag buddies. Let’s hold each other accountable for sharing our wins.”
You’ll be amazed at how much easier self-promotion feels when you have someone in your corner.

Here’s your reminder:
Self-promotion is not self-centered—it’s self-honoring and it inspire others to do great things.
It’s how you own your brilliance, expand your influence, and inspire others to do the same.

So, let me ask you:
What’s one win you’ll share this week?
Big or small—own it, celebrate it, and let it be seen.

If you found this episode helpful, share it with a friend who needs this reminder. And don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review—it helps more women like you discover this show.

Until next time, keep showing up boldly. You’ve got this.

If you’ve ever felt paralyzed by overthinking, worried about every tiny little detail, or avoided taking action because it might not be “just right,” this episode is for you to go from Overthinking to Overcoming: Confidence for Perfectionists.

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Hello my friend, and welcome back to The Lucy Liu Show, the podcast where we help high-achieving women like you to cultivate unshakable confidence and step into your boldest, most authentic selves.

I’m LL, a confidence life coach and speaker, and today we’re diving into a topic that so many of you have told me you struggle with: perfectionism.

 Today, we’ll explore:
 Why perfectionism kills confidence
 How to shift from overthinking to overcoming
 And three powerful strategies to help you take imperfect action with confidence

So, if you’re ready to stop letting perfectionism hold you back and start making bold moves, let’s dive in.

Let me start by saying this: perfectionism is NOT the same as having high standards.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to do a good job. But perfectionism is when the fear of failure, judgment, or not being “good enough” stops you in your tracks.

Here’s the kicker: perfectionism pretends to be our friend trying to protect us, perfectionism pretends to be a strength. It makes you feel like “oh you’re being so responsible”. 

But in reality, it’s quietly chipping away at your confidence.

Here’s how:

1. Overthinking leads to self-doubt. When you constantly second-guess yourself, your brain starts to associate action with uncertainty. The result? You lose trust in your own instincts, you lose trust in self belief and you lost trust in your ability to overcome when in reality you have it all within you.

    

2. Perfectionism leads to procrastination. You keep delaying actions because you’re waiting for the “perfect” moment. You’re waiting for yet another sign, you’re waiting for external validations. Spoiler alert: it never comes unless you make a decision.
3. You fear judgment more than you value growth. The more you prioritize avoiding mistakes, the more you avoid opportunities to learn and evolve. We as human beings all make mistakes, it’s a natural part of life, what you learn from each event in life is crucial to your future self so make sure you are making decisions today that your future self will thank you for.

Here’s the truth: Confidence doesn’t come from perfection—it comes from getting it done and consistent repetition. Confidence is built through action, not flawless execution. 

So, how do you break free from the perfectionism trap?
Let me introduce you to a mindset shift I call: Progress Over Perfection.

Think about it—confidence grows through doing, not through polishing.

When you embrace imperfect action, you develop competence, which then fuels confidence.

Here’s a real-life example:

When I wrote my book, overthinking too many details I actually wrote nothing for a whole year. Procrastination kicked in, imposter syndrome creeped in. Then when I finally reminded myself to just make progress and set my calendar to write just one chapter a day, about 1000 words a day, the entire book was finished in 21 days. Then from there I was able to quickly improve my draft and complete the book soon after.

The lesson? You can’t improve what you never start.

 Alright, let me give you three actionable strategies you can start using today to break free from overthinking and build confidence through action:

1. Set a “Good Enough” Timer
When you catch yourself overanalyzing, set a timer or deadline.
Use that time to make a decision or complete a task. When the time is up, commit to moving forward, even if it’s not perfect. 

 2. The 70% Rule
Most of the time we tend to wait until we feel 100% ready. The problem is, maybe that day never comes. So instead, commit to taking action when you feel 70% ready Because the remaining 30% is often just fear and self-doubt dressed up as “preparation and planning.”

 3. Celebrate Imperfect Wins
Perfectionists tend to only celebrate “perfect” outcomes. Instead, start celebrating the act of showing up. The simple act of getting started or getting it done deserves a celebration.
Post the unpolished video. Send the email that’s 90% right. Every time you take imperfect action, you’re rewiring your brain to associate action with confidence, not fear.

Oh and a bonus tip, add an ex- in front of perfectionist, I declare that I am an ex-overthinker, I am an ex-perfectionist. Pause for a minute and say it outloud right now! I declare that I am an ex-overthinker, I am an ex-perfectionist I am no longer that version of me.

 Here’s your takeaway for today: Confidence comes from doing, not perfecting.

The next time you find yourself overthinking, ask:
“What would I do right now if I knew it didn’t have to be perfect?”
Then—go do that thing.

And remember: imperfect action will always move you further than perfect hesitation.

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a fellow perfectionist who needs to hear this message. And if you haven’t already, hit that subscribe button so you never miss an episode.

Until next time, keep showing up, taking messy action, and owning your confidence.

You’ve got this! 

This episode is for you if you want the confidence to make more money with your email list, even if that email list is small, no matter what industry you’re in. You’re in for a treat, my friends, because I love my guest today, my friend and fellow Angeleno, Miss Shannon Bondi, aka the email queen, who helps business owners make money using email. 

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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

This episode is for you if you want the confidence to make more money with your email list, even if that email list is small, no matter what industry you’re in. You’re in for a treat, my friends, because I love my guest today, my friend and fellow Angeleno, Miss Shannon Bondi, aka the email queen, who helps business owners make money using email. Doesn’t that sound amazing? Welcome. 

Hi, Lucy. Thanks for having me.

So good to see your face on zoom. Again, we’ve chatted many times before. And it always brings me a smile to talk to you.

Oh, that’s so nice. I know. I always love to get to see you and chat with you as well.

Awesome. Okay, so let’s get straight to it. What are some of the biggest mistakes you’ve seen people make with their email list that’s costing them money?

Oh my gosh, so many. And any of them I’m telling you today are probably ones I have made myself. So don’t feel badly that if you are making some of these, but things I see is not emailing.

That’s the biggest one I probably see is that people get in their heads about it and just don’t do it. And then often I see one of the biggest ones I feel like I see is that often people just become kind of a robot when they get in front of their emails, right? So they’re like, you’re like so funny and personable online or on like social platforms.

And then you get into your emails and you’re like, hello, I am a person that would like to send you an offer. And like, I’m like, who’s this? Like, why?

Why am I not getting this fun personality in here? And honestly, this was a mistake I made for a long time in my emails, too. So I think what we to remedy that we should just act like we’re talking to one person, right?

Like, how would you answer a question to just talk to one person? How would you say something like if you’re telling a story? How would you say that to like your best friend, right?

And those things, when we bring that into email, you make it so much more personal and so much more fun and interesting and more you to your audience.

I love that. Okay, so what’s the number one mindset shift someone needs to adopt in order to start email as a profit generating tool?

Oh, yeah, that’s a good one. So again, I think we get hung up on this idea of like needing to be really professional and all these things in email where I would argue the more fun you have, the more fun your subscribers will have too. So I think we tend to, we just need to reframe a little bit when it comes to this, right?

Like our emails don’t always have to be selling like the way we think like, yes, we want to make money from them, but we don’t always have to be like pushing business, pushing sales, all of these things, sometimes just showing up and then inviting people to go deeper with you. So like if you show up, you tell a story about like a client win or even something like you noticed, I’m, I always do this, like I’m out and I see something and I’m like, Oh, that’s a great email. Right?

Like, I’m like, Oh, I should make that email. And so I’ll like tell a story around it. And then I’ll be like, if you’re struggling with storytelling, XYZ, whatever it is you teach, right.

Or help people do, if you’re struggling with that, let’s go deeper. Come join me inside this offer, right? Like, or join me inside or email back and let me know what your biggest problem is or things like that.

So you’re not constantly feeling like you’re quote unquote being salesy. You’re really sharing more of an experience and how you can go deeper with them.

I love that. It’s like having a more awareness of where you’re going. Just like when I first started writing my book, I took a course on book writing and it was all about that.

It was about that awareness. Think of a story. What did you learn from that?

And that becomes one chapter of your book. And the same with email, you can be just going on about your day and something you see or hear or learned, right? That could be an email idea.

So be more aware, consciously searching for topics. And I think the more you are aware of it, the more you actually see it coming everywhere.

Exactly. Yeah, we have a saying in my membership that everything’s an email. It’s literally everywhere. Anything you do can be an email.

Yeah, I like that. I know what really helped me when I first started with zero subscribers was that my business coach telling me that she was making six figures with 400 people on her list. So I think it’s not about the size of your list because I’ve also talked to people who had like 10,000 people on their list and they weren’t selling anything and they weren’t making anything.

So how do you go about increasing your sales and revenue per subscriber, would you say without feeling salesy?

Yeah, I think this is something people get tripped up on a lot, mainly because I know you and I Lucy have been in this industry for quite some time. So we’ve seen quite a lot of things. So a lot of people who do teach email and that are like what I like to call the celebrity quote unquote celebrity entrepreneurs that teach email kind of have this old school way of thinking.

And I’m not knocking anyone so much as they just are sharing experiences that were like from 10 years ago and anymore, it’s not the case, right? So for instance, they’ll say, Oh, you’ll only sell to 2% of your list. So you have to grow your list to a certain amount if you want to make a certain amount of money.

Whereas yes, this, this statistically mathematically is probably true. However, I’ve proven this wrong hundreds of times because my philosophy is you want to attract your ideal client to your email list, not just trying to get out there to hit a number. So like, you don’t want to like trying to attract everyone and their brother to your email list so that you can like try and sell a certain amount.

Right? Whereas if you’re focusing on just attracting hyper-specific people that are like your people, you’re going to have much more success with a small list because it’s full of ideal clients that want your offer, are interested in your offer and just want to get to know you more and want to understand your offer more. And if it’s right for them.

Beautifully said. I love that. Like I help women.

So I get excited, right? When the subscriber is a female name, that’s, that’s my, that’s my, my people, right? A man on my email list that would not be helpful for me.

Fair, fair. Yeah. No.

And I think, like I said, I think we get caught up in these vanity metrics, right? Of like, just, it just comes from being on social and all the things like that society, you know, deems valuable. And so we get caught up on that, but I’m like, if you have 10 ideal people who are on your email list, like that could be a goldmine if they’re the right people.

So it’s just, yeah. Again, I think we’ve just gotten this old school mentality of like, you need to have more to make more, but I find that that’s just not true anymore these days.

Yeah. Okay. So what happens when you think your email lists subscribers are cold?

They’re very cold. They’ve never purchased from you, but they just learn about you somehow. What’s your goal to strategy to turn those cold, uh, subscribers into hot buying leads or people who really want to work with you?

I love this question.

Cause I literally just taught a class on this this week. And so I’m very excited to talk about this. I just taught a warmup, like rewarming up your list.

If it’s, you know, you have some cold subscribers, but if, if somebody, so there’s two ways of kind of answer your question here. So the first way is if you’ve had a list for a while and you’re just not seeing sales and all of this kind of thing, you probably do need to do some sort of list cleanup, which would re-engage these cold subscribers, get find out if they’re even interested in your offers. And if not getting rid of them actually can boost your email list stats and getting your emails in front of people that actually want them.

Um, so it’s a good strategy to do, but if you’re like newer to email and you’re just getting new subscribers on, um, the way I would do that is I would make sure you have some sort of good welcome sequence or warmup sequence for them to go through so they can get to know you. And, you know, I have a lot of strategies of how to do this in the best way. I think a lot of things out there are helpful that teach, but I think that they kind of aren’t teaching the way that I teach it.

And so I think that there’s a certain way to go through a welcome sequence with your new subscriber that really can, um, warm them up and get them into a sale a lot faster, like collapse that timeline. But like I said, a lot of the things I see out there with, you know, Oh, get my, my free, like, you know, welcome sequence or, or here’s my cheap, whatever one. Right.

And I’m like, you really need to customize it to your client and to your ideal, like subscriber, because if you don’t, it’s just, it’s, it’s just going to fall flat.

Mm. Yeah. But that, that reminded me of when I first started with my business coach, my very first business coach, like I did not interact with her at all.

I was watching her, right? So just because you’re getting nothing, it doesn’t mean people aren’t reading your emails. They aren’t watching you.

They are. So what you do matters and don’t give up because people are waiting for your help or your product. And it’s not something that you are not doing right.

You are doing it right. And people are out there. They might not be reacting to them.

Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.

It’s like anything, right. That we put out there. I think I always say this too, because when you post something on social, you get instant gratification pretty quickly, right?

Like you post a story or, or a post or whatever, and people like it or comment and you’re like, okay, this is doing well. And I actually bring this back to school when we were kids and like, we had to turn in assignments and we get a grade and it’s like, did I do okay? And so I think we all are just looking for that A plus on our papers.

Um, so when you send an email so often we don’t hear anything, right? Like it’s crickets. And so we’re like, is anyone even liking this?

Is this even working? And so to your point, I agree, like really just keep emailing because that’s really going to solidify you. The other thing it does is it keeps you front of mind to people.

They see you showing up and you might be the only person in your industry showing up regularly. Even if they’re not responding, they’re seeing you do this and they’re like, well, if I see her all the time or see the same thing she’s saying all the time or talking about all the time, she’s probably onto something. And I should probably pay attention.

Love it. Love it. Okay.

Okay. So let’s talk about what you actually write in your emails. What’s your formula for writing a subject line that attracts attention or boost open rates?

Oh, I love that question.

So I tend to write my subject lines after I’ve done my email in general. Sometimes I have an idea before and I, you know, maybe I’ll like a tagline I’ll pop in my head. Um, plus if you’d asked me even a few years ago, if like subject lines were my jam, I would have been like laughed at you.

But like now I’m, I love them. Like what are my favorite things to write? But I tend to do it after I’ve written my email because I can pull something from my email that like is intriguing or bring something out of the story, um, or whatever it is I’m sharing.

So, um, what I like to think of is what I open this email and I’m, I’m a tough sell. Like I’m very hard to get to open an email. So I think like, would I open this email?

Would this intrigue me enough? And I think a lot of times, again, we get kind of like technical because of the emails we see, right? Like we’re on like old Navy’s email list or whoever’s emails that they’re sending all the time.

And they’re just like sale, blah, blah, blah. Right. And like, so we’re like, Oh, email’s gross or it’s weird or subject lines have to be kind of like this one way.

No, I literally sent an email the other day that said everybody poops. That was literally my subject line. Um, so like have fun with it.

Like think of like things that will stop people when they’re scrolling through their inbox and get them to open it. And we also want to be careful not to be click baity too, right? Like we don’t want to put something that isn’t in your email or that doesn’t give them any kind of satisfaction when they go into your email.

So really I just like to think of, like I said, would I open this email and how does it like intrigue delight, make somebody stop in their tracks? Like, how can I get somebody to just kind of go, wait, what I need to read this, I need to know more. What, what is this?

Um, so I know it’s not like the most structured formula of all time, but that’s kind of the, like things I ask myself when I’m creating a subject line.

Do you like using emojis in your subject lines?

Personally? Yes. Um, but what I recommend is I wouldn’t use more than like one or two, depending on what you’re doing.

And I wouldn’t recommend using it to replace a word in case someone doesn’t, like if you were saying, uh, like t-shirt sale or something, you wouldn’t want to just use the t-shirt like emoji sale because if the, like somebody’s email isn’t loading right, or they don’t have emoji, that emoji or something like that, then it will just look weird. So I don’t like to replace words with emojis, but I do love to use a good emoji every now and then in my subject. Actually I use one pretty often, but it’s always like accompanying the email, not replacing words.

Perfect. Okay. How about the copy?

How should we write it so that it actually moves people?

Okay. Yeah. Copy.

So it actually moves people. That’s a great question. Um, so I like, again, I really like to think like I’m talking to a friend that’s, that’s like my, my number one copy tip is like, how can you write this?

Like you’re speaking to a friend? Like you wouldn’t start a story with like the other day I was walking down the street with my dog and like, you would jump into the story of like, you’re not going to believe what I saw on the street the other day. Like when I was walking my dog, or you’re not gonna believe what happened to me when I was walking my dog.

Right. Or something like that. Like you’re going to kind of jump in or like, you’re not going to like, or maybe you even jump into the story of like my dog ate a peanut, you know, or whatever it is right on the street.

And a squirrel got mad at it. Like, you’d be like, what, what is happening? Like you’d want it.

You want to bring people in immediately. So, um, I even say like, I don’t even start my emails anymore with like, Hey name, because I see that in so many emails and I’m not saying it’s bad to do if that’s like what you want to do. But I just jump into things, right?

Like I’ll be like, um, did you know an elephant has three toes? I made that up. I don’t know if that’s true, but I, um, you know, do you know, an element elephant has three toes first name, instead of saying like, Hey name, because then I’m bringing them in a lot quicker because we only have a few seconds, right?

People are email or reading emails when they’re in line for coffee, or they’re like picking up their kids in the car pool lane or something like that. Right. They’re not sitting down at their computer typically and reading emails like they’re, they’re doing it on the go.

So I want, I, I think the rule is you only have like 13 seconds or something like that for email. I’m sure it’s probably less than that now. Um, so I try and jump right into my stories or whatever it is I’m getting into because people are just busy and they don’t have time for stuff.

Um, I always say too, if you have passed third grade, you can write an email, like literally you do not have to be a amazing writer. You don’t even have to honestly be a good writer. You just have to be able to have a very easy sentence structure that you can write for people.

And you did that in third grade, probably even second grade, honestly. So you can really just be simple and have short sentence structure, get people through your email. Don’t have huge, huge long paragraphs.

Um, because most people don’t just sit and read. Um, and there are exceptions to that rule. Like maybe if you’re an author, for instance, like, and you’re known for writing long, complicated things, or I had a client one time who was like, she wrote long, heartfelt emails, but her audience was like trained for that.

So they knew to sit and expect that every time they got an email, they were like, Oh, I’m going to have this like heartfelt message. So there are exceptions to things. But in general, my favorite thing about email is it can be short, simple and sweet.

Love it. Short and simple and sweet. What’s your take on the new trend, the AI trend, Shannon?

Okay. So I can always tell when the email is written by AI, but I will say it’s really helpful. I think it’s a great place to get you started.

So I think put in, you can train AI so easily now to kind of get your brand voice. You can put it in there and then make sure you just edit it and look at it because there’s so many things that it like just doesn’t do well yet. I’m sure it’s going to continue to get better, um, over time.

But I always just like, if I use it to start something, it’s great for ideation too. So if you’re just stuck on what to say, that’s a great thing you could put in there of just like, Hey, what are some things my ideal client’s struggling with right now? And like, it could give you a list of things and spark an idea.

You could have it, like I said, get you started, but I would go in and make sure you’re looking through it and editing it. Because like I said, I have, I, in my membership, I have people submit emails in there. I can’t even tell you how many times I get it.

And I’m like, so chat to BT wrote this. Uh, I want to hear what you have to say, not what the computer has to say. Um, so I think it’s really important that like, I think it can be a great tool, but I think we need to moderate it as well.

Beautifully said. Okay. So you’ve been doing this for a long time.

What is something that, what is a myth you want to debunk for people around email?

Ah, I mean, okay. One, I for sure that kind of just grinds my gears is when people tell me email doesn’t work. Like I hear that one.

Luckily, I don’t think most of your listeners, if they’re listening to this episode are thinking that, but I do hear that one quite often, um, of just like, Oh, email doesn’t work anymore, blah, blah, blah. And I’m like, you wouldn’t even believe the amount of money people make from email. Like it is bananas, how much money people use or they make from email.

Um, so it’s that, um, would be a big myth. I would just love to, I wish I could touch people and be like, honestly, I wish I could go back to business, baby business owner, me and be like, girl, learn email because it will change your life. It literally did once I finally learned it.

So that would probably be part of it too, is like, if you want, don’t believe email works, let’s change that. But then also like, just learn how to use email in your business and use email in a productive way that works for you and your business. And you’re going to just see incredible results.

Would you recommend including a call to action, a CTA in every email?

I would recommend including a CTA in every email. There are a time and place that you don’t necessarily have to, but I would say in general, yes, I would have one, but it could be as simple as reply to this email. It could be as simple as here’s a post I put up on social that you should check out or, um, like a podcast episode or YouTube, something you listen to and you liked, like, it doesn’t even have to be something of your own content.

It could be this podcast episode. If you really enjoyed it, you could send an email about it or put it in a PS in your email or just say, Hey, if you’re looking for a good episode or, you know, my favorite episode I’ve heard this week or something like that, you could totally share those kinds of things too. So it doesn’t have to be like always a sale.

It doesn’t always have to lead to, um, something that like is business related. If that doesn’t feel aligned for you.

I think when I first started, I was afraid of unsubscribers. It made me really sad when someone unsubscribed, but not anymore now, because I know I provide value whenever I send an email, but how would you go around the fear of being unsubscribed?

I love that question. This would have been a good myth for me too. So I agree with this one because I feel the same way.

Like I still get a little bit sad every now and then when I see somebody leave, but there’s several things we want to keep in mind. One it’s almost never personal, right? Like almost never are people leaving email lists because they’re like mad at you or upset with you or anything like that.

They’re probably leaving because their inbox is out of control. Um, they’re not interested in what you have to offer. So it’s actually a favor to you to be like, Hey, I’m not going to open or buy from your emails.

So I’m just going to get off your list. Um, or they’re just, you know, live in life. Um, I have a friend who’s an email marketer and we were talking about it one day and she said she had somebody get like, come back to her list.

I guess that’s another great thing is people can always come back to if they change their mind. She said she didn’t even know the person had unsubscribed and she came back and she wrote her and she said, Hey, this is the craziest story, but she goes, I was, um, diagnosed with cancer and I had to go and I just unsubscribed from everything. I needed everything out of my life.

And she goes, and your emails were ones I actually missed. So I got back on your, now I’m in remission. I’m fine.

I’m feeling good. And I’m back on your email list. And my friend and I were like, we will never judge anyone for leaving our email list ever again, because it was such a compelling story, right?

Of just the reasons she had to put up her own boundaries. And so maybe that’s all people are doing, right? Like they’re probably, again, it’s, it’s likely not personal.

It’s likely that they’re just living their lives like all of us.

That is so good. I love that story. And it is true.

I mean, I myself, I clean my email once, once a year, at least to unsubscribe. And yeah, there are ones that I do miss and come back to but other ones I try to keep my inbox as clean as possible, right?

Yeah, exactly. It’s so easy to get out. I’m like a serial email list signer upper, you know, somebody who’s got a freebie.

I’m like, I’m in. And then my inbox is like, you’re at 98%. Babe, and I’m like, Okay, we got to cut back.

Beautifully said. Okay, awesome. In your days working in and out of your business, when you need a little picker upper, is there a quote that you resort to?

Oh, that’s a good question. I think one of my favorite quotes is probably not all that wander are lost. I love that one of just because I’m I love to go on adventures and things like that.

And and I think it can really relate to us in business too. Because often, when we’re out here doing things, we’re sometimes feeling a little lost, right? Because we’re, we’re all just we’re in marketing, or at least, you know, I am.

And so and marketing’s constantly changing, things are constantly evolving, people are learning different things, and they buy differently. And so sometimes we feel like we’re a little lost when it comes to, you know, anything in business. And so I always kind of think sometimes we’re not, we’re not necessarily lost.

We’re just we’re just wandering. And we’re finding our way through our own adventure.

I love that so much. Yes, to adventure in life. Yes, to having more fun.

And yes, to writing more emails with confidence, right? Yes, yes, yes.

Remember, at the end of the day, it’s just an email.

Awesome. Okay, so if you’ve enjoyed this episode, go follow Shannon at Mrs. Vondy. I love her Instagram.

I am addicted to waiting for her dog walk stories.

That’s so sweet. Thank you.

Thank you for being with us. Thank you.