​In uncertain times marked by global conflict and economic instability, reconnecting with your purpose helps you stay grounded, intentional, and empowered.

Key points:

• Challenging times create fear, but your response is still within your control
• Purpose acts as your internal anchor when everything external feels unstable
• Confidence is quiet steadiness, not loud certainty
• Your purpose can be simple and rooted in your current season
• You are still allowed to grow, thrive, and feel joy despite uncertainty

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Let’s be real for a moment…

We are living in challenging times.

Right now, as I record this, we are in the middle of a war involving Iran.
The global economy is feeling it.
Gas prices are rising, I’ve seen over $8/gallon.
The stock market has been down for probably 5 consecutive weeks.

And whether or not you follow the news closely…
You can feel it.

There’s a heaviness.
An uncertainty.
A quiet question in the air: What’s going to happen next?

And in moments like these…
It’s easy to feel powerless.

But today, I want to remind you of something incredibly important:

You are not powerless.
You are purposeful.

Hello, hello beautiful souls,

Welcome back to the show.

Today’s episode is a real one.
It’s honest. It’s grounded. And it’s deeply needed.

Because when the world feels unstable and uncertain…
Our minds try to find safety.

We look at numbers.
We look at headlines.
We look at everything outside of us…

Trying to predict… trying to control… trying to prepare.

And yes, it’s true—
Global conflict has disrupted oil supply,
pushed prices higher,
and shaken financial markets.

You might be noticing it in your daily life.

Maybe you’re thinking twice before filling up your tank.
Maybe your investments look different than they did last year.
Maybe your sense of security feels… a little off.

And I want you to hear this:

Your feelings make sense.

Your feelings are valid

But also…

This is exactly when purpose matters most.

Purpose is not something you turn to when life is easy.

Purpose is what holds us steady when life is hard.

Because purpose is internal.
And everything happening right now?

That’s external.

When everything outside of you is shifting…
Your purpose becomes your anchor.

It grounds you.
It stabilizes you.
It reminds you:

“This is who I am.
This is what I’m here to do.
No matter what’s happening around me.”

Here’s the truth most people forget:

Even in uncertain times…
You still have choice.

You may not control global events.
You may not control the economy.
You may not control the market.

But you always have control over:

• How you show up
• How you treat others
• How you speak to yourself
• How you move forward

And that is powerful.

Because purpose is not just a big mission.

It’s lived in small, daily decisions.

It’s choosing to stay grounded instead of spiraling

It’s choosing to stay kind instead of fearful

It’s choosing to stay intentional instead of reactive

Easy times don’t define you.

Challenging times do.

Anyone can feel confident when things are going well.

But who are you when the market is down?

who are you when the prices are rising?

who are you when the future feels unclear?

That’s where your real identity lives.

And this is something I deeply believe:

Confidence is not about being loud.
It’s about being steady.

It’s about having a quiet certainty within yourself that says:

“I don’t know exactly what’s coming…
But I trust myself to handle it.”

So if you’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately…
Disconnected…
Anxious about everything happening in the world…

Come back to this question:

What is my purpose in this season?

Not five years from now.
Not when things are perfect.

But right now.

Maybe your purpose is:

• To take care of your mental health
• To support your family
• To continue building your business with intention
• To be a source of calm for others

Oh and also purpose doesn’t have to be big to be powerful.

It just has to be true.

Let me say something that might feel surprising:

Even in challenging times…

You are still allowed to thrive.

You are still allowed to feel joy.
To grow.
To expand.
To create.

The world doesn’t need more fear.

It needs more grounded, purposeful people
who are rooted in who they are.

People just like you.

So today, I invite you to pause.

Take a breath.

And remind yourself:

The world may feel uncertain…

But you don’t have to be.

Your purpose is still here.
Your voice is still needed.
Your presence still matters.

And no matter what is happening around you…

You get to choose who you are within it.

If this episode resonated with you,
share it with someone who needs a little pickerupper right now.

And as always…

Stay rooted.
Stay intentional.
Stay you.

I’ll see you in the next episode.

In this conversation, Sonali Chandra shares how embracing her truth as the lead of Virgin taught her to live life on her own timeline, set strong boundaries, and find confidence despite societal pressure and criticism.

Sonali Chandra is a speaker, performing artist, multi talented TV personality and lead lady in the documentary show called “Virgin” available on Hulu Discovery Plus and TCL.

5 Key Takeaways:

• Own your truth unapologetically. Real confidence comes from accepting who you are and refusing to conform to societal expectations or timelines.
• Being “different” can be your greatest strength. Sonali turned what made her stand out, her personal story, into a platform to inspire and educate others.
• Boundaries protect your peace. Cutting ties with unsupportive people and refusing to engage with critics is sometimes necessary for personal growth.
• Mental health matters. Therapy, mindfulness, and staying present helped her navigate anxiety, criticism, and the pressures of public visibility.
• Success starts with self-belief. Focusing on what you can control, showing up authentically, and letting go of others’ opinions creates opportunities and confidence over time.

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WATCH THE EPISODE

FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Hello, hello, beautiful souls. Welcome back to another episode on the Lucy Liu Show. And I am really excited today because I have my friend Sonali Chandra here today.

Sonali is a speaker, performing artist, multi-talented TV personality, and lead lady in the documentary show called Virgin, available on Hulu, Discovery+, and TCL, and so many other TV shows. I love Sonali’s story, and welcome to the show.

Thank you, Lucy. Thank you for having me. I’m so thrilled to be here.

Let’s begin with your, maybe a short version of your story for those listeners that may not have met you yet.

Sure. Hi, everyone. My name is Sonali Chandra.

It means golden moon in Sanskrit. Sanskrit is the dead language of South Asia, just like how Latin is the dead language of the Western world. I was born and raised in America.

My parents are from India, so that makes me Indian American. And let me tell you, that’s a blessing and a curse because both personally and professionally in my journey through life, I have found that I had to pick from both worlds when it comes to like navigating life. But yeah, so I grew up dancing.

Thanks to my parents, Indian classical, Bollywood. I wanted to study theater in college. I had to get a real job though.

So I studied, I chose finance because I wanted to make money. Started my career off on Wall Street in a mystery called New York City. But you know something, Lucy?

I was miserable. I was miserable in Manhattan. It was not my passion at all.

I had a quarter-life crisis and after I got my corporate bonus, I left New York City for Los Angeles. It has been eight and a half years. I went from finance to film in the interest of happiness.

I think everybody should pursue their dreams. We only have one life to live. And so yeah, it’s been eight and a half years.

Persistence does pay off and always pursue your passions. Beautifully said. And you didn’t mention the virgin part.

So yeah, I came here for acting, like a lot of people do, right? But I opened my mind to other forms of entertainment, Lucy. So think of entertainment like a house.

Like in any home or house, there’s different ways to enter it, right? Through the front, the back, the garage, the side. So same thing when it comes to entertainment.

There’s dancing, modeling, acting, hosting, stand-up comedy, singing, magician, unscripted reality TV. So I opened my mind to other forms of entertainment. I’ve been booked for a little bit of each kind of entertainment over the years, but I found that my expertise and my strength lies in unscripted reality TV.

I realized, you know, entertainment, it’s a very competitive field. Cutthroat competition, you gotta stand out. And what I realized about myself is that my virginity, my V-card, if you will, is what makes me stand out compared to my fellow colleagues, friends, millennials, and whatnot.

And so, yeah, I took a risk. No risk, no reward. I chose to be vulnerable with my most authentic, intimate, personal truth.

And that has seemed to be my ticket to fame. And it’s not just about fame, Lucy. It’s about inspiring and informing and educating and entertaining audiences.

That’s what my life purpose is about.

I love your story. At what point did you realize that your path might look different from other people? And how did you make peace with that, not to conform with the rest of the world?

Deciding to be different and not choosing to conform with society’s expectations or parental pressure, it comes with time and emotional maturity. It really does, Lucy. I had a quarter-life crisis.

That’s when I came to LA. And I would say it was in my early 30s when I just had an epiphany. I just didn’t care what people thought of me.

I was just gonna do what I wanted to do. But having that detachment and that emotional strength to just let go of what people think of you, especially your parents, that’s key to just pursuing your dreams and making sure that it’s good. Just do it, like the Nike commercial.

I love it. Just do it.

But was there ever a season where you questioned your choice because you felt behind compared to others? Because that was my story. I, at a younger age, I always felt behind.

I will admit it was around that same time, in my late 20s, early 30s. I saw a lot of my fellow millennials getting married, having kids, and it did hit me. Like, why not me?

What’s wrong with me? But thanks to therapy, and I think everybody should go to therapy, mental health is just as important as physical health. The mind-body connection is real.

I’ve learned that that’s their path and good for them. But for me, I was born to stand out. I’ve realized my calling, Lucy, is to do the things other people are scared to do and speak about the stuff that society is scared of.

So my therapist helped me gain that emotional strength to just not care and just shrug it off. I’ve realized that I’m 39 years young now, but forever 21 mentally speaking. I’ve realized by not getting married so early on in life, I’ve also avoided my first divorce.

And again, for me, in my life journey, I’ve realized that Botox is more important to me than babies. And my car is like my kid and sometimes I want to dump my car. So that tells you in a nutshell where my priorities are.

And there’s nothing wrong with that. I think there’s a lot of women out there who have chosen not to have kids by a certain age and whatnot and teach their own. Just own it.

Yes, yes. I love it. So this is not, I mean, your story might not be, if you’re listening, might not be something similar to Sonali, like still having her V-card at almost 40.

And I love that. And I want more women to hear, young girls to hear that it’s okay to be different than what society seems, right? Because you have your own timeline.

Exactly. Whatever your truth is, whatever your journey is, just own it. Don’t be ashamed.

Don’t think that you have to conform to societal expectations or parental pressure. It’s your life. Just do what you, what feels right to you.

Yeah, but oftentimes, people project their own beliefs onto you.

So how do you hold boundary when that happens? I’ve learned the hard way in terms of how to manage that, Lucy. So thanks to therapy, I’ve learned not to add fire to fire and not to reply to riffraffs.

So I’ve had a number of haters in the course of my life, especially here in LA, who have turned out to be very critical, judgmental, non-supporters, if you will. And I just cut ties with them. I did.

Looking back, I wish I knew a certain four-letter word that starts with F and ends with K. But again, that comes with emotional growth and maturity. At this point in my life and my career, at 39 years young, 40 years young, as you mentioned, sort of, you know, in a couple months.

At this point, I’ll just say, use that four-letter F word towards them. Like, Lucy, am I telling people who have gotten married, women, non-mo, you know, whatever, like, why did you get married? Why did you have kids?

You know, you should get divorced. You should dump your kids. I’m not telling people that.

So then why? I’ve learned, you know, why do people think that they can tell me what their two cents about what I’m choosing to do? Lucy, haters stands for having anger towards everyone reaching success.

And critics are just lousy, lazy losers who have nothing better to do other than to put other people down in an effort to make themselves feel better. That’s really the hard part.

That is so true. Like, we don’t convince other people to get a divorce. We don’t convince other people to dump their kids, right?

Exactly! Teach their own. Live and let live.

But of course, there’s this roller coaster I’m sure that you go through because we are human. So we have this roller coaster, right? What inner work help you stay firm though when you have to really, when people start convincing you that your choice is wrong?

Lucy, I have learned that life is a roller coaster as is the entertainment world. I’ve learned to enjoy the journey and just rejoice in both the valleys and the peaks. Thankfully, you know, again, it comes with time and emotional maturity.

Like, I’ve developed the strength to just ward off haters and critics. Like, I know myself and that’s key. It really is, especially working in entertainment where I still encounter time’s up, Me Too type situations.

And thankfully, my most intimate truth is out there. So when creepy men try to take advantage of me, I’m like, do you know what Google is? Do you know what Hulu is?

Check out virgins. And then I walk away. And my most intimate truth is public information.

So if a man, if you will, wants to try to take advantage of me or if anybody’s trying to hate on me, I’ll be like, look, do it or do that. I’m on national television. What have you done?

Yeah, you know, talking about national television, I met you, you know, a year ago when we walked into the same room. You just really extruded this beauty and confidence and I loved you right away and your story and I went on YouTube and I watched your show and you know what, all the comments below, a lot of them were actually negative. They were doubting you.

They were assuming you were lying. Like I feel like that’s how society is when they see a woman on TV and they all of a sudden they have all these doubts about her and I’m like, wow, you know, that was not on my mind when I saw you. I’m like, this girl is so beautiful.

Her story is so beautiful and I need my daughter to learn that there’s another option out there in this world. How did it feel when people doubted you and assumed you were a liar?

You are absolutely right. I’ve had direct hate mail, people telling me, oh, I think you’re a liar. You’re so beautiful.

How can it be that you’re still a virgin? Lucy, men have tried, but it’s not like I’m just going to give it up just like that. It takes, again, it takes emotional willpower, discipline, knowing who I am to just stay strong.

When I see the hateful comments, both in my direct inbox, not just on social media, but on my website, but then also on public, you know, sites like YouTube, I find amusement, quite frankly. You gotta understand, Lucy, like these people, I’ve never met them. And the fact that they’re putting in their time and effort to write even hateful comments, there’s a saying, Lucy, any press is good press.

So, you know, I take the good and the bad when it comes to being a public figure, a humble public figure, no nepotism happening here, Lucy. My parents are immigrants. I believe yours are, too.

You know, yours are from China, right? Mine are from India. China and India are neighbors.

But yeah, I actually take amusement and I’m actually grateful for all the both positive and the negative comments. I’ve never met these people. And another thing I want to point out, Lucy, these people who write nasty, hateful comments, they have no face to their name.

You know, they’re cowards at the end of the day. If you’re really going to be a brave critic, show me your face. What do you do?

You know, like the fact that they’re contributing their time and effort to write hateful comments tells you something about them.

Oh, absolutely. But did you experience anxiety around sharing something so personal on national TV?

I did in the beginning. So my debut on the national international platform coming out as the Millennial Virgin was at age 33. It was on The Dr. Phil Show. That was the first time I was on national television. That was the first time I publicly shared my most intimate truth. I was a bit starstruck.

The Dr. Phil, like…

Wow, yes.

I first discovered him on Oprah 20 years prior, you know, because when I used to watch Oprah at four o’clock on Channel 7 back in New Jersey. Back then, did I have any thought of entertainment or Los Angeles? No.

So I was a bit nervous, but I realized that this was a gift, you know, that the universe had brought to my attention and to be on national television. And you gotta understand, Lucy, it was during COVID. So it was just me and him on stage.

His wife was in the audience and I had mostly a virtual audience. I just rode with the flow, you know, like it just went with the flow and I just, I rejoiced in it. Again, no nepotism.

And I, and even the adrenaline, Lucy, I turned it into excitement and just confidence, really. That’s, when you’re just thrown in the limelight, you just deal with it. You know, you just make things happen.

It’s just, everything just works out. I found that I enjoy being in the limelight and being a source of inspiration to not just women, but also men out there of any culture, country, race, or religion.

Yeah. What coping tools along the way or practices do you think have helped you the most to manage pressure, manage anxiety?

So I have a finance degree, but a dual minor in psychology and leadership. And I’ve also been in therapy myself for about a decade. Everybody should enroll in mental health therapy.

I’ve learned just taking deep breaths, just closing my eyes and just, closing my eyes and just taking deep breaths through my nose helps. You gotta be present. You gotta be, just calm down.

There’s a, there’s a saying, Lucy, your masterpiece will happen when you master peace. It’s true.

It is so true.

So yeah, just focus on the now. Take one day at a time. Focus on the present.

The present is a gift, Lucy. Depression is being stuck in the past. Stress and anxiety is about, pertains to, and is about worrying about the future.

You can’t control what happens in the future. What you can control is your reaction to whatever happened. But that’s why, you know, famous practitioners like Deepak Chopra, Oprah, Tony Robbins, they all talk about meditation, just focusing on the present and being in the now.

That’s what helps me navigate the roller coaster of life and to this day, entertainment.

I love it so much. That’s my all-time favorite quote. Yesterday is history.

Tomorrow is a mystery. Yes! Today is a gift, which is why we call it the present.

Absolutely, yes! Bingo!

Did you consider yourself confident before filming or did confidence grow through the experience of your past seven years on TV?

Work begets work. Press begets press. You gotta enjoy the journey.

Doing the craft, whether it’s being in school for training or auditioning, that is success. When I audition, I just give it my best and I forgot about it. I let the chips fall where they may.

And I found that mindset has enabled me to achieve the success that I have been able to achieve in the past seven, eight years here in LA. I don’t worry about, again, what people think. I just give it my best.

I just focus on, again, what I can control and just doing it. Again, the Nike commercial, just do it. Enjoy the journey, learn the craft, do your best in the audition and just give it your best.

And that’s the best you can do in life, right? You know, whether it’s personal or professional. You bring, you know, when it comes to dating, if you will, whatever advice I can give you, I just, this is who I am.

Take it or leave it, guys. You know, if not next, move on. You know, like same thing with your career.

When I found that you don’t really care, that’s when things work out in your favor.

Beautifully said. What else was the most unexpected lesson you learned along the way?

You know, Lucy, being the child of immigrants, the daughter of immigrants, being born and raised in America, I learned growing up that it’s very important to respect your elders. And I found as I’ve gotten older, I have had to unlearn that. I’ve realized that respect should be mutual.

So it’s not that I just respect my elders. My elders also have to respect me. I’ve learned that the hard way.

And I’ve learned that lesson, especially from haters, because I’ve had both, unfortunately, women, both South Asian and not, who were older than me, hating on me. And I’m like, you are, you are married. You are, you do have kids.

You have money and a financial stability. Why are you hating on me? And like, I realized like I was doing what they wish they had done when they were my age.

And that’s why they were hating on me. But that’s not my problem. You know, that they were living in regret.

And so to make themselves feel better, they were hating on me and disrespecting me. And I had to shut them down. And I learned the hard way that respect goes both ways.

It’s not just me respecting my elders, whether it’s my parents or my aunts, my uncles, someone who’s like an older sister to me. It goes both ways. We’re all adults.

And Lucy, what there’s a saying, I’m going to paraphrase it, but like in adulthood at some point, we all just are equal. We hit a plateau. And so that’s a really hard lesson I’ve had to unlearn.

And it’s just, it’s life, right? Life is a journey.

I love that you mentioned unlearning because yes, it’s important to to be learning, but it’s even more profound when we have epiphanies after unlearning certain things.

Oh, yes.

Our upbringings from childhood, like you mentioned because of the immigrant background, but you know, it doesn’t really matter where our cultural background comes from. It doesn’t matter if you were born in America or not. We as humans collectively go through many of these ups and downs in life and it’s perfectly normal and we’re all learning together and collectively rising.

Change is difficult, but it’s not impossible. Change is only constant, Lucy. It really is.

I love it.

If someone listening feels behind and a little short on confidence in life, what would you tell them now?

When I was in my 20s back in New York, I used to work in the finance field. I met with the then CEO of MasterCard, Mr. Ajay Banga. He is Indian just like myself.

I met him through the Indian community of New York City. I was 25 having drinks with him at the core club in Midtown Manhattan, 5 o’clock on a weeknight. He gave me some very profound life advice, Lucy.

He said, no one knows how much is in your bank account except you. All that matters is how you present yourself and how you treat other people. It’s so true and I hold on to that piece of wisdom to this day.

I really do. What a beautiful story, Sonali.

Thank you so much for being with me today. I love your presence, your beauty. Is there a quote or mantra you go by in life?

I’m an Aquarian, as is Oprah, and Oprah said it best, owning your truth is the most powerful thing you can ever do. And that’s my life motto. I am famous for my most intimate truth, which is being the millennial virgin and I’m damn proud.

So yeah, Oprah, thank you. You’re a fellow Aquarian just like myself. I look up to you so much.

You know, she’s a financially independent woman. No nepotism for her either, right? And she look at her now, you know?

Yes. So go on YouTube, search for Sonali, search for the show Virgin and you’ll hear her story and it’s streaming on a bunch of networks. Thank you.

Streaming on Hulu, HBO Max, TLC and Discovery+. Check it out. Virgins.

Everybody has that quality until some point in life.

Are you being confident or delusional? 

I ask you this question because I have actually been asked this question more than once. 

Lucy, do you think you’re a little too confident in yourself? 

And my answer is no. 

I believe we need to be delusionally confident in order to shatter all of our negative self-talks and actually make bold moves.

For me personally, it was being delusionally confident that got me to where I am today. But today I do want to talk about something we don’t really say out loud. There is actually a difference between confidence and delusion because there is a fine line.

But at the same time, I can’t just be delusional thinking I’m better than others, or I don’t need help, or I’m always right. Happy New Year, by the way. I’m recording this as it is the new year of the fire horse, thus the red.

And if you care about growing, leading, or building something meaningful, this is important because there is a difference. 

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Here’s what I see all the time. Some people have too much confidence.

They don’t listen. 

They don’t ask questions. 

They assume they’re right all the time, even before they start anything.

So yes, this kind of confidence can lead to bad decisions, broken relationships, and missed red flags. 

But you know what? 

Even more people are on the other side, the side where people are fully capable, super smart, and already are ready, but don’t trust themselves. 

They wait, they overthink, and they talk themselves out of opportunities.

But most people are stuck somewhere in the middle, trying to believe in ourselves without crossing into fantasy land. So when you look at people who are actually successful long term, they’re not the loudest in the room. They are confident, but more so they are curious.

They are driven by curiosity, but they also listen. They can change their mind when something isn’t working. Now compare that to people who think confidence means never being wrong.

They ignore feedback. 

They blame other people. 

They confuse confidence with being unshakable.

And that’s where things start to go down south. 

Real confidence isn’t about being certain all the time. It’s about being honest with yourself.

I’ve seen people with big energy and big dreams burn everything down slowly. 

They believed in themselves so deeply that they stopped listening. 

Warnings are brushed off.

Concerns are called negativity. 

And what stood out to me was that they didn’t fail because they lacked confidence. 

They failed because they refused to question it.

Here’s the difference that changed how I see this. 

Confidence says, I believe in myself. 

And delusion says, I don’t need feedback.

One helps you grow and the other keeps you stuck. 

Real confidence isn’t loud. 

Real confidence doesn’t need to prove anything.

Real confidence is very calm. 

Real confidence is grounded. 

Real confidence is trusting yourself and at the same time, staying open to learning.

That’s the balance we’re trying to find. The sweet spot. 

I’m curious, where have you seen confidence turn into delusion? Maybe in yourself or others.

Share your thoughts in the comments. 

And check out all my other episodes where we talk about building real confidence.

Anisa Crespo shares how leaving a six-figure career, choosing faith over fear, and doing deep inner work allowed her to build wealth, freedom, and legacy; make 6figure days while empowering moms to rise, expand their vision, and lead with integrity.

5 Key Takeaways

• Confidence is a decision backed by daily action: growth comes from choosing who you’re becoming, not waiting to feel “ready.”

• Fear keeps powerful women invisible, and faith must be chosen intentionally when doubt, success, or failure shows up.

• True success is freedom, not a number, freedom to live life on your terms while staying aligned with values.

• Not all money is good money: building wealth with integrity requires saying no to opportunities that drain your spirit.

• You don’t need to start ahead to rise: stop comparing your chapter 2 to someone else’s chapter 12 and expand what you believe is possible.

Anisa Crespo is the influential Co-Founder of Million Dollar Mom Inc, a groundbreaking visibility company that elevates women into wealth, leadership, and legacy. With her signature mix of strategy, energetics, and powerful brand vision, she guides entrepreneurs in aligning their businesses with their highest frequency to create sustainable, exponential growth. A devoted twin mom and woman of faith, Anisa embodies what it means to rise in both motherhood and entrepreneurship, building a seven-figure empire in under a year alongside her business partner, Natosha Navarro.

Together, they have created a world-class ecosystem that includes The Million Dollar Room, a luxury mastermind retreat and docuseries filmed in Laguna Beach, a global platform amplifying women’s voices, their Million Dollar Network, bestselling book anthologies, and live experiences designed to position women for high-level visibility. Their mission centers on helping moms transform into millionaires by giving them the platforms, mentorship, and community needed to scale with clarity and confidence.

Anisa is widely recognized for helping women embody wealth and step boldly into their influence while building legacies that impact generations. Today, she is a sought-after mentor, speaker, and executive producer, creating transformative spaces where women are seen, celebrated, and elevated to the world’s largest stages.

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WATCH THE EPISODE

FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Hello, hello, beautiful souls. I’m so excited to have you back with me because I have a very special guest, Anisa Crespo, with me today. She is the co-founder of the Million Dollar Mom Society and a passionate advocate for women’s visibility, empowerment, and legacy.

As an executive pursuer, podcast host, author, and speaker, she shares her journey to inspire women to rise on their power and build lives they love, and that’s what I’m all about as well. So I’m super excited for this conversation. Welcome to the show, Anisa.

Thank you, Lucy.

I’m excited to be here and share with your audience today. Thank you.

Awesome. So you left a six-figure career to start your businesses. What was the moment that you knew staying in your six-figure career would cost you more than leaving?

Yes, I was in a male-dominated industry for over 10 years and I woke up one day, had a spiritual awakening, and realized that I needed to help women. I didn’t know how I was going to do that or what I was going to do, but the how and what is none of my business. The who and why is.

And so I knew why and I knew who and one thing led to another, but really helping someone scale from seven to eight figures in a company over the course of 10 years and then realizing I can do this for myself.

Yay. We all know it’s very, very different between a regular corporate job and entrepreneurship, but who did you have to become internally before external success could expand?

Yeah, so I was on a journey of personal development for several years before any of this transpired. I overcome a lot of trauma in my life, decades and decades of it, and I got to a point after my mother passed away in 2017 and going through a lot of grief and loss over the course of a few years where I found personal development and really did the work. And so it requires action every single day.

It’s not like, oh, all of a sudden you’re fixed. You’re the next version of yourself. Every single day, I work at the person that I’m becoming tomorrow.

So the woman that I’m going to become at the next level is who I’m focused on every single day and it does, it requires a lot of work, but it is worth it.

What identity shift was the hardest in between those times for you?

Yeah, so my whole life, I mean, growing up in a family with a single mom, we were always struggling financially. Everything was always complaining and negativity and, you know, we were loved, but that was just the type of world we lived in. And so I thought that was my identity.

I thought that was normal, you know, cousins and aunts and uncles getting together and talking about everybody else. Like I just thought that was a normal thing. And then after finding personal development, I realized that this is not normal behavior and I don’t have to choose it.

And so I choose to be happy every day. And so the identity of being broken and coming from a broken home and, you know, being the victim mentality and even an employee mentality, that shifted for me a lot and stepping into the role of CEO and leadership. Those were the biggest challenges, but again, totally worth it.

Yeah, and now you advocate for women’s visibility, but what do you think so many powerful women are kept from being on scene, even when they’re successful? What’s keeping them on scene?

Fear. It’s the fear of what other people are going to think about them. It’s the fear of failure.

It’s the fear of success, getting successful and then being able to hold that success and repeat it over and over again and scale it. That’s the biggest thing that women struggle with is just that fear. And what I always tell women is there’s no place for fear and faith.

So you have to choose one. So you’re either going to live in fear over faith. You’re going to worry about everything and everyone else or you’re going to have faith, faith in yourself, faith in the plan, faith in God, the universe, mother nature, spirit, whoever that is to you.

And that no matter what happens, everything will work out.

I think it’s that strong belief, right? Really true belief. Like we say, I have faith.

I believe in whoever the higher power you believe in, but then a little curveball is thrown at you. Are you still owning your power, right? So what does owning your power look like for you when you’re juggling faith, family, business, when that curveball is thrown at you?

It’s just remembering why, why I started in the first place. What is my purpose here on Earth? It is standing in my power means to me being in alignment.

So I am a person who if anything is out of alignment for me, I feel very blurry like very just almost like, you know, how you have an ear infection and you have like your equilibrium is off. That’s how it is. If anything is out of alignment for me.

So whether that’s clients who really don’t fit or forcing something that is seems like a good idea, but it’s really not that to me is really being able to step away from things and say no to things that is standing in my power.

I love it. I hope everyone listening will continue to stand in their own power, but I believe there probably was a point in your life when you realized you were playing it safe. How did you personally move from playing it safe to playing it bigger?

It all comes down to making a decision when you make a decision and then you take massive action to back that decision up every single day. You’re well on your way. So when I was working my job, I was making six figures.

I ticked all the boxes that a successful corporate woman could want in America, you know, I had a good boss, good colleagues, work from home, flexibility, seniority, like all the things and something was missing. I just my cup was no longer being filled like that job served me for 10 years, but then my cup was no longer filled. And so I made a decision that I was worth six figures a day.

And when I decided that I was going to leave my job to start a business, I told people friends family my plans. They called me a lot of things smart was not one of them, but now I make six figures a day. So I love it.

I love it because I say this all the time as well. Everything you want is only a decision away because having the confidence is a decision how you want to live your life. That’s your decision who you spend time with.

That’s your decision. Everything comes down to that one decision that can change the course of your life.

Yeah, 100% I couldn’t agree more it everything we consume whether it’s the food that we put into our body whether it’s the media or the social media that we read or listen to or you know, every single thing you choose what is going to be the outcome and the results are all about the decisions from today. So the results of tomorrow is about what you decide to do today. It’s just like a weight loss journey, which you know, I have been on my entire life and it’s getting up and going to the gym on the hard days, you know the days where you don’t feel like you want to go but the results and the payoff are always worth it in the end.

Yes, and so many people think we have to learn more on this journey and I believe that along the way even more important for us to unlearn things. Was there a belief about confidence or playing it bigger? You had to unlearn on this journey in order to get there.

Oh, absolutely. I mean my mom always taught me to go to school get a job climb the corporate ladder and then live happily ever after so I went to school. I got a job.

I climbed the corporate ladder and then the happily ever after was missing. So I had to unlearn that piece of it and say, you know what there’s more to life than just this and for me, I will never teach my children to go to college. I will teach them how to invest invest in real estate invest in business.

I will teach them how to invest in themselves how to start a business how to sustain a business how to sell and once they have all of those skills, they can do anything that they want in life even go to college.

I love that and the same with me for my daughter. I’m telling her yes, you’re going to school, but it’s not about what you’re it’s not about the what happened in history that matters. It’s about learning your habits.

It’s about your discipline. It’s about how you live life that I want you to get out of school. Yes, absolutely.

How do you define success now versus before freedom?

It’s what makes you happy a lot of people think that success is a number in a bank account or a number of clients or you know, any kind of number where it’s defining monetary stats and I just don’t believe in that because everybody has their own definition of what success is when it comes to revenue and income, right? Like there’s some people who it could be completely life-changing to them to make $10,000 a month and then there’s other people who would cringe at the idea of making $10,000 a month. So it’s all about what makes you happy right for me success is being able to have the freedom to do whatever I want as far as if I want to take my kids to the park in the afternoon, I can I don’t have to answer to somebody I have to answer to myself.

If one of my children is sick, I don’t have to check in to see if there’s space on the calendar for me to take them to a doctor’s appointment. If I want to take a vacation, I’m not checking a calendar to see if there’s anybody else that’s off during those days. I just happen to know that I created a life where I have freedom that I can do the things that make me happy and still live an abundant life beautifully said we’re doing it for our children.

What kind of legacy are you always really consciously modeling for your children through your work showing them that they can do whatever they want to do as long as they believe in themselves number one and then number two again take massive action to back up those beliefs. So a lot of times, you know, people throw around manifestation. They’re like, you know, I’m manifesting this and that and it’s like, okay, you can’t manifest your dream life sitting at home watching Netflix on the couch.

Now that’s not saying that you know, you can’t have an amazing life and binge watch a series now and then what I’m saying is if you’re not putting in the work every single day and being consistent consistency is the key then you are not going to weather the storm of what it takes to be successful.

Yeah. So what else do you want to say to the moms who feel guilty for wanting more?

Oh my gosh, there’s so much of this. It’s you know, when we’re when we’re in our role of motherhood, we’re feeling guilty that they’re not, you know, we’re not working our business when we’re in our business working our business. We’re feeling guilty that we’re not spending time with our kids and really that kind of never goes away.

I mean, we’re always going to have that but what I will say is that, you know balance as far as what is important to you, right? Like I don’t mind sometimes if my kids come in my office and I’m on a call like it is what it is. This is my life.

You might see a toddler running back and forth and that just is what it is. Whereas some people might draw the line at that and say no absolutely not if I’m on vacation, I have no problem checking in with emails or you know clients or anything like that because I’ve built a life where Monday through Friday. I also can take time off to go do whatever I want to do.

So it’s not like oh my gosh, I’m living just for the weekend or I’m working just for the weekend so that I can live then or I’m working just for a vacation so that I can live then. No, I live intentionally every single day. And so what I would say is if you’re feeling like you’re wanting more, there’s nothing wrong with that.

It’s there, you know, a lot of people think you’re being greedy or you know, you’re you should be focused on your family first. My family comes first. God comes first.

My family comes second. My business comes third. That’s the way I run my life.

And there is nothing wrong with wanting more. Everything that you desire, you deserve and you are capable of.

Yes, so much is in that. What is building wealth with integrity? And you mentioned faith a lot and I’m a big believer in that as well.

Has there been challenging times before for you to balance that ambition with a lineman and faith?

Absolutely. Not all money is good money. I’m going to tell you that right now.

There is money out there that is not clean. And when it comes your way, it’s very enticing. But really standing again in your power and being able to say no to opportunities that seem financially abundant, but will drain the life out of you.

That is really where that piece comes in where you can say, okay, I really felt like I honored my integrity in this moment. Beautifully said.

What’s a story of one of the biggest transformation you’ve witnessed with the women you’ve coached?

So we had a client come to us over the summertime and she was doing about $10,000 to $20,000 a month. And she said, I want to double this. And we said, why?

We said, why not 10X it? And so her mind had not been expanded to that ever. And she was just like, you know, a lot of people think that scaling and growth is linear and you’re supposed to go up and up and up this way.

And it doesn’t have to be that way. You can be here and go here and it’s a lot easier to 10X than 2X. And within a few weeks, she had done her first six-figure month.

So is that a common trait you see in moms who are thriving is really expanding that mindset of way more than you initially expected?

Oh, yeah. A hundred percent. A lot of times, unless you have seen someone else doing it, you don’t even know that it exists.

So when I first started my journey into entrepreneurship, I just started immersing myself into spaces where women were doing unthinkable things. I’m talking about like million-dollar cash days and it seems almost impossible. But when you see women doing it, and then you start to get to know these women and talk to them and realize that they’re just regular women just like you, it starts to seem possible for you too.

And then you can start to make a way for it. And then the universe can start to make a way for it for you because now you believe it and you can see it in your head.

Yes. But for women who’s thinking, well, because they’re starting at a different place than me, I’m starting from zero. So for that person who’s just starting, is this still possible for them?

I started from zero.

Most people start from zero unless you’re, you know, born into wealth and you’ve been handed, you know, you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth. Most women are starting from zero and what I will say is don’t count other people’s money. Okay, and don’t compare your chapter 2 to somebody else’s chapter 12.

It’s everybody has their own journey and everybody is on a different path and some people go faster than others. Some people have different circumstances than others. Don’t compare yourself to other women.

Just take a look at the women that you aspire to be like and say I can do it too. And I’m going to do it on my timeline.

Yes, but you know what? Doubt shows up for all of us. How do you personally move forward without waiting for certainty?

That never goes away.

So doubt will show up at every level of your business, whether you’re just starting out or whether you’re scaling from 7 to 8 figures. It doesn’t, it doesn’t go away and every time you level up, you’re going to experience a new level of doubt and this imposter syndrome and you know, it’s the way to manage it is to understand that you need to re-regulate your nervous system for that level of success. So doing again that personal development work and really leaning into embodying the next version of yourself is really helpful when it comes to that and remembering your why because a lot of times when we’re doubting ourselves, it’s because fear, fear is the number one thing that holds us back.

We’re afraid of failure. We’re afraid of what other people think about us, what they’re going to say about us. We’re afraid of succeeding and not being able to hold that success.

And so whenever you get that, just ground yourself, take a step back and remember why you started in the first place because if there’s no mission behind it, then might as well just go work a job. Oh, yes.

Was there a mistake along your journey that taught you something really valuable?

No, there wasn’t a mistake. There were multiple mistakes. Yes.

Endless mistakes. Yes, of course. Yes, there were so many.

If I had to pinpoint one, I probably couldn’t. I mean, we, mistakes are learning lessons, right? Like they’re, they’re the opportunity to reflect and say, okay, here’s what works, here’s what didn’t work.

And more importantly, moving forward, now I can go into it even clearer and move, move through it without having to worry about, oh, is this going to work? Is this not going to work? I already know what does and doesn’t work.

And so now I can move through and try again or try something else and have that clarity and have that experience and not have to worry about it.

Okay, and if you’re listening, you know, we all make mistakes and it’s okay. Give yourself grace, but learn from it and know that there’s a new devil at every level. So we’re all in this together, but we are rising together.

What last reminder do you want every woman listening to Carrie after this conversation?

Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are correct. Your belief, particularly your belief in yourself, will dictate your destination. Beautifully said.

Great reminder. Awesome. Okay, so how can we connect with you?

The best way to connect with me is on Facebook, Anisa Crespo. Shoot me a DM, send me a friend request. I’d love to connect.

Thank you for being with us today. 

Thank you, Lucy.

Have you ever noticed how much pressure there is to be the best?

To be number one.
The most successful.
The most visible.
The one who’s winning.

Sure! maybe on the outside, it looks like ambition.
Looks like you have a drive.
You have high standards.

But today, I want to talk about what often lives beneath the need to be number one.

Because underneath that desire, what I often see in women is actually fear. And it’s important to address these fears because it will keep you from reaching your potential!

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST

WATCH THE EPISODE

For so many high-achieving women, the fear isn’t failure.

It’s being overlooked.

It’s the quiet fear of:

• Being forgotten

• Being replaced

• Being invisible

• Doing meaningful and hard work… and having no one notice

So striving to be the best becomes a form of protection.

“If I’m the top performer, they can’t ignore me.”
“If I’m exceptional, I’ll be safe.”
“If I’m number one, I’ll finally matter.”

This is not about ego.
It’s about scarcity.

Scarcity tells us:
“There’s only room for one.”
“There’s not enough attention.”
“If someone else wins, I lose.”

Scarcity creates comparison.
Comparison creates urgency.
Urgency leads to exhaustion.

And suddenly, your work is no longer rooted in meaning,  it’s rooted in fear of losing.

Fear of falling behind.
Fear of not being chosen.
Fear of disappearing.

Fear of not being good enough. 

Fear of what others will think of you.

But here’s the truth that changed everything for me:

You don’t need to be the best to be valuable.
You need to be aligned.

Let’s talk about visibility.

Many women feel torn between wanting to be seen  and not wanting to perform for approval.

So we overcompensate.

We push ourselves harder.
We speak louder.
We chase metrics instead of meaning.

But visibility that requires you to give up yourself
will never feel satisfying in the long run.

Real confidence isn’t about being the loudest voice in the room.

It’s about trusting that your voice matters, even in stillnes, even if you are not #1

When you stop trying to outshine others,
you create space to stand firmly in your own work.

Doing Meaningful Work Without Needing Validation

What if your work didn’t need applause to be worthy?

What if impact mattered more than recognition?

When you stop needing validation:

• You make braver choices

• You take fewer shortcuts

• You create from integrity, not urgency

You stop asking:
“Will this be impressive?”

And you start asking:
“Is this true?”
“Is this aligned?”
“Does this serve?”

And something powerful happens…

Your work becomes deeper.
Your energy becomes steadier.
Your confidence becomes unshakeable.

What You Gain When You Stop Trying to Be the Best

When you stop trying to be number one, you gain:

Peace.
No more constant comparison.

Clarity.
You know why you’re doing what you’re doing.

Longevity.
You stop burning yourself out to prove something.

Trust.
In your timing. In your path. In your voice.

You stop competing for attention
and start attracting the people who are meant for you.

Because the goal was never to be the best.

The goal was to be fully yourself, without fear.

A Gentle Reframe

Instead of asking:
“How do I become number one?”

Try asking:
“How do I do my work with honesty?”
“How do I show up without shrinking or forcing?”
“How do I lead with calm confidence instead of fear?”

Because when you release the need to be the best,
you create something far more powerful:

Sustainable confidence.
Meaningful impact.
And a sense of enoughness—right where you are.

If this episode resonated, I invite you to reflect:
Where in your life are you striving out of fear…
instead of grounded belief?

And what might open up
if you stopped trying to be the best
and simply allowed yourself to be true?

Thank you for being here.
I’ll talk to you in the next episode.